ooof i've been feeling busy. and full.
new thoughts, ideas, and plans have been skimming off the surface of my brain like a meteor that bounced off the atmosphere (can they do that? how bout a space capsule? it was in apollo 13 so it must be true)
I did discover, delightfully, that swimming is going to be one of my antidotes to the sensation of over-fullness. I once loved to swim, doing laps at community pool, not for 'exercise' but just to do it. kind of a meditation. what a perfect way to sneak in exercise to my schedule (psst! nobody tell me its good for me!)
and i've been a mite bit cranky, sorting thru some things regarding my relationship with something I'll call the SWA... I took a class (twice, in fact), loved it, received much from it, and it was a helluva good time... knew it wasn't 'everything' for me, and ended up sliding away from much of it without letting go of the good stuff I learned...
and I am now receiving advertising for its next upcoming session, and also for its advanced program... and it sounds, of course, so, so good.
Who doesn't want a life that is extraordinary?
my thoughts have been going something like this: I've realized and acknowledged, largely thanks to this class, that it is essential to follow my own inner calling, where i hear it. To be grateful, daily, for the blessings of being me. To honor my self when I hear that inner voice that says "I don't want to Do that." or "take the ride." To know that hot baths and hugs and laughter are essential. For me. To know if someone offers to fly you to Paris for a week and you want to go, you say
Yes.
But what the hell does extraordinary really mean, and why would I need to take a class, again, to get a grasp on that?
Do I feel the need, the desire, to stuff myself like a goose being prepared for pate, of all of the 'good stuff' as defined by a class I've already taken? Something happens when you get a group of people together... there's a group-think that sometimes goes on, an almost magnetic alignment, where what someone else is doing looks way more special, important, or fun than whatever it was you were doing. And sometimes, it just might be, and it's good to feel that out from time to time. But not always. Sometimes, its just nice to hear someone else's adventures, and not go along for their ride. Sometimes, someone else just believe their own press, and when you look at the fine print, what you got ain't lookin so bad at all, and you wouldn't trade your sandals for a mile in her stillettos.... but you can honor her choices as her own.
I prefer a comfortable sandal with some style to it to a stilletto. They're safer, I can walk all day in them, and I can still have my painted toenails seen. If I, as I am, choose to wear stillettos, I might spend a few hours in them, tops, then switch to flats. Which is more pleasureable? The sexy beauty of a stilletto along with the discomfort of having your whole body weight carried on a few square inches (and carrying an extra pair of shoes to change into), or a still-cute but more, dare i say, practical sandal that you can wear all day and dance in, without any thought whatsoever?
Leading an extraordinary life is a state of being. Its a choice and a perspective that doesn't just come from the 'brain'. Its a decision to eke out joy and pleasure where ever you can find it, and listen to your inner guidance system when it says "time out. where the hell are we going, exactly?" To feel your way through situations and circumstances in a way that calls for a listening that goes deeper.
To live
conscious and
awake. To honor yourself most deeply, by following that inner voice which is most truly and clearly your own.
To stop looking for answers in other people.
And what, after all this, does My inner voice say? The class was great. Fantastic. Life-altering. I am grateful for the ride. I'd recommend it to anyone. But the ride of my life is totally my own. I always have the option if I chose it, to take the class again, or the advanced program. As an alternate... I can take the money and invest it. I can go on vacation. I can buy body butter, lingere, and cosmetics by the truckload. I can spend my time learning French. Becoming better friends with my friends. Laughing more. Sleeping in. And living more awake to Me.
